Apr 22, 2008

Curtis update

The kids are back in school after having their spring break last week. I didn't get to post here as often as I wanted because I was spending alot of time with Curtis trying to get his attention so he could learn some new chores around the house. He is awesome when it comes to picking up toys and dirty clothes. Now though he is wanting to learn how to fold his clothes and to do dishes. He aslo wants to learn how to cook. I'm not quite ready to teach him that just yet as his attention span is 2 seconds flat! He is folding his shirts better than I do at times! Pants are harder for him but he is not giving up on it! Dishes are anther story all together. He prefers to just play in the soapy water and washing a dish consists of wiping both sides but not removing the food from them. He is teaching me patients.....something I never had until I gave birth to him! Folding a basket of clothes takes me 5 mins. Teaching him it takes an hour or longer. Dishes about a half hour for me as I tend to stop and get drinks or to get the kids out of stuff they should not be in. With teaching Curtis is takes 2 hours! I have to show him with each item how to properly clean it even if he is washing a plate and he just washed one. Though he is so proud of himself with each plate, bowl, spoon or fork that he washes! It's like seeing him wash each one for the first time over and over and over again with his face just beaming and glowing with pride!
I just wish his teachers would have more patients for him. I take the time to go over and over and over a task with Curtis until he finally gets the task done without my help or input. Yet they can't seem to be bothered. I know there are other children in the classroom they need to teach as well. I understand. What I don't understand is why they are insisting that he needs meds in order to have enough attention to do a task the first time without prompting. There has never been a task that I have showed Curtis how to do one time and he was able to do it alone. Never. It's a part of who he is. I have accpeted it and work with him until he is able to do something alone.
I'm so frustrated. When it comes to his teachers I feel like I talk to the walls. I feel like I bang my head on the walls over and over expecting it not to hurt.....but it does. I had a meeting today with the school board. As you can guess they again brought up his attention span with me. As if I don't know about it or even care. I do care and I do know. I have known since he was a baby. I know there are meds out there in the world that *Could* help him. However we have been down that road and it just does not work. After trying 5 diffrent pills for him and having it effect him in a negative way.....We...his father and I....decieded that meds were not the way for him. We have accpeted Curtis the way he is. We have decided that we don't want a *cure* or a *fix* for him. We want to work with him and teach him at his own pace along this journey of his life.
I know that I could pull him out and homeschool. I didn't do well in school and niether did Hubby. I know I could find someone else to homeschool for us but then what about socailization? It's just not an option for us. I hate coming out of these meeting feeling like somehow I am failing. I hate that every one just points out the *bad* things about my son. What about all the things he can do or is learing to do that was never come to be?? Does that stuff no longer count???
Hubby and I are going to be looking closely at our finances. We are going to find some money weekly to help the inlaws do the repairs on the new place. Hopefully between the two incomes of thiers and ours we will be able to complete them a little sooner and get in there sooner. The new district is smaller. And I have heard the teachers work better with the children. I hope that the teachers and everyone else that I will come in contact there will actually use their ears and listen to what I have to say. And being that I have spoken to the new district a few times already.....my hope soars sky high.....because I have a deep gut feeling that this will be the best thing ever.
And until then? I will be working extra hard with Curtis about maintaining his attention span here at home. Dishes and laundry are a good place to start for him. And after that???? There just might be a 6 yr old...soon to be 7....learning how to cook! I wonder what his teachers would have to say about that???


wheresthebox said...

This post really struck a couple of chords with me - my son has been wanting to learn to wash dishes as well; I think because he likes playing in the water. I don't think he is ready but hate to say no when he wants to help.

He turned 6 in March and will enter kindergarten this fall - I am so nervous about working out all the details and really getting it right!

Elizabeth said...

Two comments-It's great that you are teaching Curtis chores, his future wife will appreciate it! :) And second, check out some of the homeschool blogs. I just spent time at Disney with several bloggers who homeschool, and their kids have no problem with socialization. There are homeschool groups that form sports teams, take field trips, and just hang out together. I'm sure you'd have no problem doing that with Curtis. If you don't think the school is helping him, and they don't have a program that is working, then homeschooling might be something to look into. Big hugs, sweetie :)

momto4kidsny said...

wheresthebox: Thanks so much for stopping in and commenting! I don't think Curtis is ready and he will be 7 in June. However I allow him to do it and show him how since he really wants to know how to do them!
It's not easy getting all the details worked out. In fact I thought for sure I had everything going right for Curtis...until now. I just take it one step at a time and I use my voice as often as I must. I even call meetings when I feel that nothing else is working!

elizabeth: I will look up homeschooling blogs to get a better idea on how that works. Who knows maybe just maybe I can get that to work better for him! I will keep an open mind about it! Thanks!